How to tell your family and friends that you are eloping

When you’ve decided together that a big wedding isn’t for the two of you and you’re starting to plan your elopement, telling your family and friends might be on top of your list. Although every family dynamic and friendship is different, here are some tips if you want them to be on board (but not present) and you’re not sure how to tell them.

Express Your Love and Appreciation:

Assure your family and friends that your decision to elope doesn’t diminish your love and appreciation for them. Emphasize that your choice is about what feels right for you as a couple. Select a time when you and your partner can have a private conversation with your loved ones without distractions. Avoid announcing it during busy or stressful times.


Be Honest and Direct:

Approach the conversation with honesty and directness. Clearly express your decision to elope and your reasons behind it. Provide details about your elopement plans, such as the date, location, and any other relevant information you’re comfortable sharing. This helps your loved ones feel included in your journey, even if they won’t be physically present.

Offer Involvement Where Possible:

Involve your loved ones in certain aspects of your elopement, such as writing letters for you to read during your ceremony, knitting a scarf to keep you warm during your elopement, or offering suggestions for the celebration afterward. Depending on your internet plan, you can also schedule a call with them or live-stream a part of your elopement. This can make them feel more included and supportive.


Acknowledge Their Feelings:

Understand that your loved ones might have mixed emotions about your decision. Acknowledge their feelings and assure them that you value their thoughts and concerns. If you plan to have a celebration or reception after eloping, let your family and friends know. Assure them that you still want to celebrate with them in a meaningful way.

Or you can tell them with your photos after your elopement

Some couples prefer to keep things a secret and surprise their friends and family after they’ve eloped. Most couples wait until they’ve received their full gallery as well as a slideshow, this way their loved ones can see the full story with all the intimate, fun and incredible moments – which tends to work magic if you want your family and friends to really understand why you decided to elope.

No matter when you decide to tell them

Remember that the start of your marriage really is about the two of you

While it’s important to consider the feelings of family and friends, especially if they are directly involved in your lives, the decision to elope ultimately belongs to you and your partner because it’s a reflection of your relationship and your commitment to each other. As long as the decision is made thoughtfully and respectfully, it can be an incredibly meaningful and memorable way to start your journey together as a married couple.